Just a little while ago I was having dinner with my family. Out of no where I popped out a question "Mum, can I take a look at your finger for that ink thingy? I want to see how is it like."
Before you say anything... Yes I live in jungle -.-" You see I'm kinda outdated and disconnected from the outside world when I was back in the hostel because I do not get Internet access and newspaper there... So I actually didn't know that they have canceled the idea of using the ink on your finger...
"No way mum! I thought they already bought it!?"
Dude, that was our money man! That was the people's money! Where the hell is our ink now!? Where in the fcuk is our money!!!???
Shame on you BN, the outcome of this election serves you well. Go fcuk yourselves Zzzz
Totally outrageous.
Showing posts with label MalaysiaN Boleh. Show all posts
Showing posts with label MalaysiaN Boleh. Show all posts
Sunday, March 9, 2008
A brand new Sunday, a brand new start, a brand new government, a brand new Malaysia (Let's hope to change for the better :-) )
It's finally over, or has it just begun? The Malaysia Election 2008 wrapped up with a final result of BN barely won with simple majority of 60+% (as oppose to 90+% in the previous general election), so happy or sad to say that they get to form the country government, again.
Interestingly enough though, this 12th general election demonstrated something beyond the result itself. Yes aside from BN is seen gradually losing grip on the countryman's faith, it also indirectly showed that the society is starting to mature in term of pursuing what they actually want and sounding their opinions without having fear that they would be shot in the head (Zzz).
Frankly speaking it shocked me so that the opposition parties actually have such influences on the states. The final outcome sees Penang and Perak (2P) taken by DAP, Kedah and Kelantan (2K) by PAS, and Selangor (OoSSSsss!!) by PKR. BN almost meets the end and kisses its trophy bye bye if not for Sabah and Sarawak (their major backbones), so much luck for you BN.
Whether Mr. Great Ol' Badawi is resigning is none of my concern, I wouldn't care who become the PM anyway (all I want is a good government, which never happens), but to see many of BN's greatest warriors once fought alongside throughout the years fell out from their Proton today... just laughed my ass out. (don't take it personal... I mean, do)
Oh before I forget, Happy Belated Birthday Sammy Vellu :)
*"hahahahahaha" evil laughter fades into the background*
Interestingly enough though, this 12th general election demonstrated something beyond the result itself. Yes aside from BN is seen gradually losing grip on the countryman's faith, it also indirectly showed that the society is starting to mature in term of pursuing what they actually want and sounding their opinions without having fear that they would be shot in the head (Zzz).
Frankly speaking it shocked me so that the opposition parties actually have such influences on the states. The final outcome sees Penang and Perak (2P) taken by DAP, Kedah and Kelantan (2K) by PAS, and Selangor (OoSSSsss!!) by PKR. BN almost meets the end and kisses its trophy bye bye if not for Sabah and Sarawak (their major backbones), so much luck for you BN.
Whether Mr. Great Ol' Badawi is resigning is none of my concern, I wouldn't care who become the PM anyway (all I want is a good government, which never happens), but to see many of BN's greatest warriors once fought alongside throughout the years fell out from their Proton today... just laughed my ass out. (don't take it personal... I mean, do)
Oh before I forget, Happy Belated Birthday Sammy Vellu :)
*"hahahahahaha" evil laughter fades into the background*
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Malaysia BN Decides
So I say, what's with the rush and hassles? There can't be any other result right? I mean, there is no eff-fing way on Earth in Malaysia in THEIR COUNTRY that BN would lose right?
Seriously I don't get it, what's the big deal man. To me this pathetic "erection" is just another lame joke, where people wasted their money on posters and papers (and wasted natural resources); not to mention wasted their time to rush back to hometown, AND not to forget the traffic jam it caused... Man I just hate big festivals, I hate it in Malaysia.
As I said, if you wanna have a real election, have it FAIR damn it! With all those big things going on out there, all those annoying obituary big dick-heads posters around... You better make it really FAIR (though I know I can't expect much)
Just overheard a short chat between my grandpa and both my parents.
"I did not see any other logo except BN itself on that paper wo..."
Abusing oldies' blur'ness, perhaps?
I'm not gonna tell you which party am I going to vote for when the time comes, but if you ask me whether I like the current government...
What do you think?
(Okay if you are really that blur, NO)
But again, there is no freaking way they would lose man! I don't really see my own country as a truly democratic country anyway.
Seriously I don't get it, what's the big deal man. To me this pathetic "erection" is just another lame joke, where people wasted their money on posters and papers (and wasted natural resources); not to mention wasted their time to rush back to hometown, AND not to forget the traffic jam it caused... Man I just hate big festivals, I hate it in Malaysia.
As I said, if you wanna have a real election, have it FAIR damn it! With all those big things going on out there, all those annoying obituary big dick-heads posters around... You better make it really FAIR (though I know I can't expect much)
Just overheard a short chat between my grandpa and both my parents.
"I did not see any other logo except BN itself on that paper wo..."
Abusing oldies' blur'ness, perhaps?
I'm not gonna tell you which party am I going to vote for when the time comes, but if you ask me whether I like the current government...
What do you think?
(Okay if you are really that blur, NO)
But again, there is no freaking way they would lose man! I don't really see my own country as a truly democratic country anyway.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Is my hair looking good? Mr. Stranger?
Okay I'm gonna make this quick, I'm having a class in 4 minutes time. I wanted to talk about this a long time ago but somehow it just got dumped to nowhere within my waves of memory.
This is not new to guys, but gals, wanna hear something "ridiculously interesting" about guys? Hah. As you all are well awared that us guys go to toilet too just like you gals, but then do you know what else they do in the toilet besides peeing and shitting?
Exactly, they look into the mirror, and make themselves look better before they leave the toilet, just like gals. And it's a fact that almost every single living gentleman on Earth does that. You know, wet their hands and style their hair even though they have been doing this for, like, the eleventh time already. But no it's not strange or odd at all, we do want to make ourselves look better (you know who are we doing that for).
But here comes the weird thing, whenever you are doing this alone in the toilet, and whenever someone else budged in, they would just pretend that they were not styling their hair but they rather would just wash their hands and chickened off.
What is it that we fear actually? I haven't the foggiest idea. Perhaps you could tell me.
This is not new to guys, but gals, wanna hear something "ridiculously interesting" about guys? Hah. As you all are well awared that us guys go to toilet too just like you gals, but then do you know what else they do in the toilet besides peeing and shitting?
Exactly, they look into the mirror, and make themselves look better before they leave the toilet, just like gals. And it's a fact that almost every single living gentleman on Earth does that. You know, wet their hands and style their hair even though they have been doing this for, like, the eleventh time already. But no it's not strange or odd at all, we do want to make ourselves look better (you know who are we doing that for).
But here comes the weird thing, whenever you are doing this alone in the toilet, and whenever someone else budged in, they would just pretend that they were not styling their hair but they rather would just wash their hands and chickened off.
What is it that we fear actually? I haven't the foggiest idea. Perhaps you could tell me.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Please at least read this, especially girls.
I know this might sound stupid and you might start to think I got insane or what, but let me finish it first okay?
Last night (this morning perhaps) I got a erm... should I put it this way, odd/strange/w**** dream about a mishap in a shopping complex involving myself.
Let's just cut this short, my parents fetched me and dropped me at a "Low Yat Plaza" (because it doesn't look like the real Low Yat at all but I recalled asking my parents to fetch me there for whatever reason), and I entered the building through a side entrance. In case you're wondering what side entrance is, remember those side entrances at Sungei Wang? Where we used to get in through those alleys?
In my case(dream), it was like this (roughly, I couldn't recall my dream very well)
Taekwon'do? Oh come on, you know I'm too good for that (ahem... okay I don't know any "*do" okay?)
Last night (this morning perhaps) I got a erm... should I put it this way, odd/strange/w**** dream about a mishap in a shopping complex involving myself.
Let's just cut this short, my parents fetched me and dropped me at a "Low Yat Plaza" (because it doesn't look like the real Low Yat at all but I recalled asking my parents to fetch me there for whatever reason), and I entered the building through a side entrance. In case you're wondering what side entrance is, remember those side entrances at Sungei Wang? Where we used to get in through those alleys?
In my case(dream), it was like this (roughly, I couldn't recall my dream very well)
(NOTE:
1. The small circles indicate strangers, and odd enough these strangers in my dream of mine are all of the *censored* race, strange.
2. The arrows on the circles indicate the directions they were facing, in which I recalled.
3. The bigger circle is, of course, the unfortunate zLz.
4. As you can see the building layout at that part is designed in a way that you have to get through a small (not really "small") space if you entered the complex through the side entrance in order to get into the mall.)
And just when I was about to enter the mall area, a *censored* guy from the right approaches me saying "ada...? ada...? ada...?" and completely blocked my way. (I don't know what the heck is that "ada" thingy, I thought he wanted to borrow lighter, watch, or whatever). And when I came to realize, I sensed that everyone in that area started to act strangely and just a matter of seconds that I realized that all my escape routes have been blocked.
"They gonna rob me!!!" ran through my mind...
I struggled, but he kept pushing himself against me (ahem...) and I couldn't help but kept shouting "tak ada!" and tried to escape. For a moment there I hoped that the shopkeeper would help me but it seemed that he was in the same gang, and so did the people in front and behind me, they just acted cool and pretended hearing nothing at all.
The things I carried on me were... a laptop, phone, MP3 player, cash, bag... (so convenient), what a dream, I mean, "heavy" dream.
And so?
So, I ended woking up from my bloody dream.
Yeah, just when the moment matters the most, so convenient again, ain't it?
Alright, let's cut this short (again), it was for sure that they were gonna get me. I'm not really sure whether it was a kidnap (a 20-year-old boy uhuh) or extortion but judging from the bulks I carried I bet it was a robbery (maybe they gonna make me strip and run in the mall afterwards).
The main point here is, what if I were readied? What if I have the weapons/skills to defend myself?
It's gonna be different ending right? I mean at least I could run out and ask for help, AT LEAST.
Taekwon'do? Oh come on, you know I'm too good for that (ahem... okay I don't know any "*do" okay?)
My idea is...
Hobby knife. Keep one of this in your bag, and stuck it in your pocket when you know you're going to malls, alone.
Just stab wherever you want, oh but if you would, don't kill them la. Try to be a little bit mercy, poke it into their eyes, feets, hands or whatever that will immobilize them to make your escape, even poking into their arses does the job too!
Okay, a hobby knife is not enough you say?
Just pick one of them already!
Alright I'm serious here kids, be careful out there you hear me?
Sunday, January 6, 2008
They ain't no Superman's, but they can do anything
Had a short chat during dinner not long ago. We talked about the major election coming and one more thing, thievery.
If you hadn't knew, my dad works as a air-cond technician. He told me that days ago he went to a kindergarten at XXX to fix something, and it somehow "fascinated" me because that kindergarten has lost two of its compressors (outdoor units of the air-cond system), for the second time. And it even "amazed" me when it was revealed that this has been happening at that area for a long time now and many houses have lost their compressors too.
I said, "Lock it, in a cage if necessary."
My grandpa said, "It's useless, if the thieves want to steal something, they will get it somehow. Lock it? They would just saw it then."
I thought what my grandpa said was correct, bloody correct indeed!
Then my dad said, "Remember that renown car that rolled out years ago? Which they'd integrate the whatever fingerprint scanner in it? So that the only person who can unlock the car is the owner itself? You know what happened then?"
?
Me, "What? They cut the owners' fingers?"
Dad, "Duh."
!
(So they would just dig your eyes out when they rolled out another new model which uses retinal scanner?)
Zzz
"Then the manufacturing of that car discontinued, and it happened not long after it was launched, thieves these days..."
Mum, "Yea, and be careful with ATM cards too..."
Me, "What? Don't they have a standard limit to how much you could withdraw in a single day? And I thought the users can set it?"
Dad, "What? You kidding? In A DAY? How about this, how about they lock you up for days, then withdraw day by day?"
...
Seriously...
Me, "So how about the compressors? Any counter-measure?"
Dad, "What? What can you do besides letting them have it? Remember what I said justnow?They will always get what they want."
...
So like, if you want to keep your cars or compressors or ATM cards away from thieves, I'd say
Unless those thieves can get their hands on nuclear, I bet you could keep them safe under my care.
If you hadn't knew, my dad works as a air-cond technician. He told me that days ago he went to a kindergarten at XXX to fix something, and it somehow "fascinated" me because that kindergarten has lost two of its compressors (outdoor units of the air-cond system), for the second time. And it even "amazed" me when it was revealed that this has been happening at that area for a long time now and many houses have lost their compressors too.
I said, "Lock it, in a cage if necessary."
My grandpa said, "It's useless, if the thieves want to steal something, they will get it somehow. Lock it? They would just saw it then."
I thought what my grandpa said was correct, bloody correct indeed!
Then my dad said, "Remember that renown car that rolled out years ago? Which they'd integrate the whatever fingerprint scanner in it? So that the only person who can unlock the car is the owner itself? You know what happened then?"
?
Me, "What? They cut the owners' fingers?"
Dad, "Duh."
!
(So they would just dig your eyes out when they rolled out another new model which uses retinal scanner?)
Zzz
"Then the manufacturing of that car discontinued, and it happened not long after it was launched, thieves these days..."
Mum, "Yea, and be careful with ATM cards too..."
Me, "What? Don't they have a standard limit to how much you could withdraw in a single day? And I thought the users can set it?"
Dad, "What? You kidding? In A DAY? How about this, how about they lock you up for days, then withdraw day by day?"
...
Seriously...
Me, "So how about the compressors? Any counter-measure?"
Dad, "What? What can you do besides letting them have it? Remember what I said justnow?They will always get what they want."
...
So like, if you want to keep your cars or compressors or ATM cards away from thieves, I'd say
Unless those thieves can get their hands on nuclear, I bet you could keep them safe under my care.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Health Minister at his best
It's on the news, it's on the radio, it's on TV, it plagues everyone's mind (especially Chinese); I know I know, our Health Hell Minister might just wanted to show us how "healthy" he is, but... through that?
Alright if you were to ask my opinion on this whole affair I'd say "Even the movie star itself has got nothing much to comment on the tape distributed and resigned without even cared to crap much about it, what am I to comment anything on it?".
But I'm gonna say this, "Politicians are the political tools themselves, they simply utilize each other, so who's the real winner in the end?" --- ME. (BLUEK~)
Oh come on the whole thing itself is a joke! What more can we say? Come on laugh all you can! It's just another bloody lame joke by Malaysians. Laugh while you can, cause another big fat lame joke is approaching - TheErection Election.
Somehow... When I read about this news and saw Datuk Chua's face, it reminds me of this movie...
And SOMEHOW in my dirty mind I started to think the other way
Paint'ing is really a paint in the arse (fonts are still okay, but Chua's head... -.-"), I shall start learning Photoshop.
Alright if you were to ask my opinion on this whole affair I'd say "Even the movie star itself has got nothing much to comment on the tape distributed and resigned without even cared to crap much about it, what am I to comment anything on it?".
But I'm gonna say this, "Politicians are the political tools themselves, they simply utilize each other, so who's the real winner in the end?" --- ME. (BLUEK~)
Oh come on the whole thing itself is a joke! What more can we say? Come on laugh all you can! It's just another bloody lame joke by Malaysians. Laugh while you can, cause another big fat lame joke is approaching - The
Somehow... When I read about this news and saw Datuk Chua's face, it reminds me of this movie...
And SOMEHOW in my dirty mind I started to think the other way
Paint'ing is really a pain
Friday, December 28, 2007
How can you not love Malaysia?
On this extremely sleepy morning (woke up at 6, I had to), my dad threw me the paper and said "Oh, B. B. was killed. At last, they got her." NOTE: Hereby me and my father hold no grudge against any particular political party in that country at all, Pakistan, if you hadn't knew.
"Okay now tell me, who the heck is this 'Baby'?" (I thought).
"Who is she anyway???"
"She's one of the most influential party leaders in Pakistan. Her husband was assassinated years ago and she was repelled out of the country since then. She made a come-back not long ago and a suicide attack was launched too but she left unharmed. And now, they finally got her."
(Like I care. No I didn't show any disrespect both to my dad and the dead itself, I mean, as you all know I have not touched politics for long. Yes, for long.)
As usual, my discussion with dad wouldn't lead us any farther than those few simple sentences. Captivated by the news and the casualties themselves (don't tell me "20" is not much, casualty can NEVER be too few), I started to think...
We've got corruption.
We've got mild racism. (solely personal opinion, no offense please)
We've got government inefficiency. (see the sentence above)
We've got mild demonstration just not long ago, call it a mild case of riot if you would.
We've got people who was willing to spend several millions to send a coconut (oh, what do you call our "head" in Malay again?) into the space when the people weren't even readied to solve alarming issues such as poverty and flood. (see that word in my heart, did you see that "F" arising?)
No, I'm not pointing the finger to anybody. It's just that, I'm actually glad.
I'm glad, for that we do not have any civil war (I doubt this will last long, please, no more eff-fing useless demonstration please! Those guys won't hear you damn it!) or hostility with any country at all.
I'm serious, I'm really glad. To think that we are indirectly allowing corruption to root in the very foundation of our ruling of the people; to think that only 2 out of 10 Malaysians out there who dare (or "care") to dig out that old 513 thingy and started talking his grandmother story to how certain race was treated MANY years ago; to think that we've got a government, which can't actually be labelled as "not doing anything at all", just that "they will start working after 1,000 complains have been made", pardon me I mean 100,000; to think that those police forces of us would have to play water-shooting once in a while to psyche themselves up (and perhaps the Malays and Indians too); to think that we can finally shoot our flag up high into the sky, and finally proudly declared "we've finally leaped into a new era", just to "show that we are capable of doing this" to other countries or in fact "we are rich enough to do this, you cared?" I-don't-eff'fing-know. To think all of that, though most of us (or perhaps only me) might have discontent regarding every single little "effort" that our government trying to strive, at least no casualty was caused.
Yeah, no casualty was caused. I like that.
Yeah I mean, I can stand Malaysia, for now, more than Pakistan, more than China, more than Korea, don't you think?
Yeah, don't you think?
"Okay now tell me, who the heck is this 'Baby'?" (I thought).
"Who is she anyway???"
"She's one of the most influential party leaders in Pakistan. Her husband was assassinated years ago and she was repelled out of the country since then. She made a come-back not long ago and a suicide attack was launched too but she left unharmed. And now, they finally got her."
(Like I care. No I didn't show any disrespect both to my dad and the dead itself, I mean, as you all know I have not touched politics for long. Yes, for long.)
As usual, my discussion with dad wouldn't lead us any farther than those few simple sentences. Captivated by the news and the casualties themselves (don't tell me "20" is not much, casualty can NEVER be too few), I started to think...
We've got corruption.
We've got mild racism. (solely personal opinion, no offense please)
We've got government inefficiency. (see the sentence above)
We've got mild demonstration just not long ago, call it a mild case of riot if you would.
We've got people who was willing to spend several millions to send a coconut (oh, what do you call our "head" in Malay again?) into the space when the people weren't even readied to solve alarming issues such as poverty and flood. (see that word in my heart, did you see that "F" arising?)
No, I'm not pointing the finger to anybody. It's just that, I'm actually glad.
I'm glad, for that we do not have any civil war (I doubt this will last long, please, no more eff-fing useless demonstration please! Those guys won't hear you damn it!) or hostility with any country at all.
I'm serious, I'm really glad. To think that we are indirectly allowing corruption to root in the very foundation of our ruling of the people; to think that only 2 out of 10 Malaysians out there who dare (or "care") to dig out that old 513 thingy and started talking his grandmother story to how certain race was treated MANY years ago; to think that we've got a government, which can't actually be labelled as "not doing anything at all", just that "they will start working after 1,000 complains have been made", pardon me I mean 100,000; to think that those police forces of us would have to play water-shooting once in a while to psyche themselves up (and perhaps the Malays and Indians too); to think that we can finally shoot our flag up high into the sky, and finally proudly declared "we've finally leaped into a new era", just to "show that we are capable of doing this" to other countries or in fact "we are rich enough to do this, you cared?" I-don't-eff'fing-know. To think all of that, though most of us (or perhaps only me) might have discontent regarding every single little "effort" that our government trying to strive, at least no casualty was caused.
Yeah, no casualty was caused. I like that.
Yeah I mean, I can stand Malaysia, for now, more than Pakistan, more than China, more than Korea, don't you think?
Yeah, don't you think?
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Astro :: Making YOUR Life Richer (has nothing to do with me please)
Warning: Long post ahead.
...
RTM 1
RTM 2
- Formerly 2
- Now 102
TV3
- Formerly 3
- Now 103
Astro Ria
- Formerly 4
- Now 104
Arab Radio & TV Variety (ART)
- Formerly 5
- Now 111
Astro Vaanavil
- Formerly 6
- Now 201
NTV 7
- Formerly 7
- Now 107
Astro Prima
- Formerly 8
- Now 105
Astro ARUNA
- Formerly 9
- Now 121
Hallmark Channel
- Formerly 10
- Now 702
Discovery Travel & Living
- Formerly 11
- Now 707
Bloomberg Television
- Formerly 12
- Now 519
NHK World
- Formerly 13
- Now 963
TVIQ
- Formerly 14
- Now 552
Astro@15
- Formerly 15
- Now 109
Astro HITZ.TV
- Formerly 16
- Now 705
AXN
- Formerly 17
- Now 701
8 TV
- Formerly 18
- Now 708
Astro AEC
- Formerly 19
- Now 301
Al Jazeera English
- Formerly 20
- Now 513
Zee
- Formerly 21
- Now 108
TV 9
- Formerly 22
- Now 119
Astro KIRANA
- Formerly 23
- Now 122
Astro Ceria
- Formerly 24
- Now 611
Animax
- Formerly 25
- Now 715
BBC Entertainment
- Formerly 26
- Now 731
ETTV Asia
- Formerly 27
- Now 316
CCTV 4
- Formerly 28
- Now 334
WaTV
- Formerly 29
- Now 315
Astro Wah Lai Toi
- Formerly 30
- Now 311
TVBS Asia
- Formerly 31
- Now 317
Phoenix Chinese Channel
- Formerly 32
- Now 312
TVB 8
- Formerly 33
- Now 313
TVB Xing He
- Formerly 34
- Now 314
Jia Yu Channel
- Formerly 35
- Now 304
Astro On Demand Drama Barker
- Formerly 36
- Now 302
Phoenix InfoNews Channel
- Formerly 37
- Now 323
Shuang Xing
- Formerly 38
- Now 324
Celestial Movies
- Formerly 39
- Now 322
HBO
- Formerly 40
- Now 411
Cinemax
- Formerly 41
- Now 412
STAR Movies
- Formerly 42
- Now 413
Astro BoxOffice Movies
- Formerly 48
- Now 951
Astro BoxOffice Movies
- Formerly 49
- Now 952
Discovery Channel
- Formerly 50
- Now 551
Animal Planet
- Formerly 51
- Now 556
National Geographic Channel
- Formerly 52
- Now 553
Discovery Science
- Formerly 53
- Now 554
The History Channel
- Formerly 54
- Now 555
Nickelodeon
- Formerly 60
- Now 612
Disney Channel
- Formerly 61
- Now 615
Cartoon Network
- Formerly 62
- Now 616
Playhouse Disney Channel
- Formerly 63
- Now 613
STAR World
- Formerly 70
- Now 711
MTV
- Formerly 71
- Now 713
Channel [V]
- Formerly 72
- Now 714
Sun TV
- Formerly 73
- Now 211
Astro Vellithirai
- Formerly 74
- Now 202
Sun Music
- Formerly 75
- Now 212
E!
- Formerly 76
- Now 712
Discovery Home & Health
- Formerly 77
- Now 733
Discovery Real Time
- Formerly 78
- Now 734
Crime & Investigation Network
- Formerly 79
- Now 732
Astro Supersport
- Formerly 80
- Now 811
ESPN
- Formerly 81
- Now 812
STAR Sports
- Formerly 82
- Now 813
Golf Channel
- Formerly 83
- Now 815
Eurosport
- Formerly 84
- Now 814
Astro BoxOffice Sports
- Formerly 88
- Now 954
Astro BoxOffice Events
- Formerly 89
- Now 953
CNN
- Formerly 90
- Now 511
CNBC Asia
- Formerly 91
- Now 518
The News Channel
- Formerly 92
- Now 514
BBC World
- Formerly 93
- Now 512
CCTV9
- Formerly 94
- Now 501
17 Digital Radio Channels
- Formerly 101-117
- Now 852-868
astro@play
- Formerly 200
- Now 882
ITV
- Formerly 800
- Now 881
Astro Stocklink
- Formerly 888
- Now 888
Astro OASIS
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 106
Astro On Demand Movie Barker
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 110
Astro AWANI
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 123
Chutti TV
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 213
Makkal TV
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 203
KBS World
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 303
Astro Xiao Tai Yang
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 325
Astro HUA HEE DAI
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 333
Asian Food Channel
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 703
Christ... 109 of them... 99 changes... and Astro expect us to "get use to" these flashy new 99 numbers...
...
Heck, not only we "press more" now (three digits instead of the usual two), not only our buttons and remote controller wears out faster (...), not only has it increases the "risk"/probability that we'd input wrong channel numbers because of the increased digits, not only our precious AA batteries wear out faster because of the increased digits we have to input and the increased mistakes we'd make that we have to press again and again (bla bla bla), IN FACT I don't mind all these! IF, the changes made would have benefit the users "in some way".
In the olden days when we first got our brand new Astro I could get use to the controlling schemes pretty quickly, in fact I've "mastered" Astro even faster than my dad. I knew thoroughly every features in Astro and I was managed to tweak in-and-out of Astro, from Channel Guide to Info to Menu... (hey it was pretty fascinating for a kid with the age of 9 to do just that yea), sometimes even my dad had to ask me for help.
But guess what I get now? The moment I got my hands on the remote controller I started to feel like I was a total idiot or some outdated "oyaji", for I didn't know what to press on the controller for the very first time of my life =_=. First I wanted to watch Wah Lai Toi, and of course I didn't get what I wanted for the first try. Then I tried Animax, and it was no where to be found (despite the fact that I didn't want to resort to the "ok" button and the Channel Guide database, I wanted a pure input of numbers with the controller)!
Gross... At last I gave up and decided to have a look at the brochure (the photos I enclosed above). And to my farting surprise I found no reason for the authority to have actually reorganized the channel numbers cause although it makes sense, but it confuses me more than it convinces me that they have made the right decision (don't know about you guys, but for me, certainly).
Using my "Extraordinary-Inaccurate-Induction-Ability" a.k.a. "EIIA~!", I have broken down the channel categories into X groups based on their "profound reinvention": -
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
When I had a go-through on what has actually gone wrong approaching to the end of the list (when things are getting "disasterrific" as the number increases), I suddenly realized the answer. Why is this happening? Why are the channels which are not supposingly in the same group/category with others are grouped together? This is simply because we human has only created 10 Roman numbers, from 0 to 9. And it doesn't make sense if any of the channel starts with a "0" so Astro has been chopped down to 9 numbers as their choices. In this case they have only managed to group channels into 9 and any further in-depth grouping would require the users to input 4-digits channel numbers. What does that sound to you? It sure sounds like "fart" to me =_=. And this explains why the channels grouping was getting bizzare approaching the last number on the list, hope you get what I mean.
So after all the crapping, the conclusion? They should have stick to their 2-digits system, that's what I think. At the very least, I don't like it, the "evolutionary system". How about you?
On second thought, if I were to group channel numbers, I'd put like, "8" for the so-called "Entertainment News Channels" (ahem, I call them the Gossipers Channels), "3" for Malaysian channels ("m"), and perhaps "69" for adult channels, if there are any.
Note: The above entry is written wholly based on individual's views/perception/feeling/opinion/crap'sion, and is not meant to flame any particular broadcasting company/race/person as it seems. Any likeliness is simply a mere coincidence and the author would not take any responsibility for what I've said/written/crapped about, please proceed with caution and consider a thousand times before you pick up your phone and call Karpal Singh.
...
Okay... Not that I'm not aware of the changes Astro has made to its channel numbers but... Not until yesterday night that I felt how chaotic it is, for me at the very least.
Skip this: -
RTM 1
- Formerly 1
- Now 101
- Now 101
RTM 2
- Formerly 2
- Now 102
TV3
- Formerly 3
- Now 103
Astro Ria
- Formerly 4
- Now 104
Arab Radio & TV Variety (ART)
- Formerly 5
- Now 111
Astro Vaanavil
- Formerly 6
- Now 201
NTV 7
- Formerly 7
- Now 107
Astro Prima
- Formerly 8
- Now 105
Astro ARUNA
- Formerly 9
- Now 121
Hallmark Channel
- Formerly 10
- Now 702
Discovery Travel & Living
- Formerly 11
- Now 707
Bloomberg Television
- Formerly 12
- Now 519
NHK World
- Formerly 13
- Now 963
TVIQ
- Formerly 14
- Now 552
Astro@15
- Formerly 15
- Now 109
Astro HITZ.TV
- Formerly 16
- Now 705
AXN
- Formerly 17
- Now 701
8 TV
- Formerly 18
- Now 708
Astro AEC
- Formerly 19
- Now 301
Al Jazeera English
- Formerly 20
- Now 513
Zee
- Formerly 21
- Now 108
TV 9
- Formerly 22
- Now 119
Astro KIRANA
- Formerly 23
- Now 122
Astro Ceria
- Formerly 24
- Now 611
Animax
- Formerly 25
- Now 715
BBC Entertainment
- Formerly 26
- Now 731
ETTV Asia
- Formerly 27
- Now 316
CCTV 4
- Formerly 28
- Now 334
WaTV
- Formerly 29
- Now 315
Astro Wah Lai Toi
- Formerly 30
- Now 311
TVBS Asia
- Formerly 31
- Now 317
Phoenix Chinese Channel
- Formerly 32
- Now 312
TVB 8
- Formerly 33
- Now 313
TVB Xing He
- Formerly 34
- Now 314
Jia Yu Channel
- Formerly 35
- Now 304
Astro On Demand Drama Barker
- Formerly 36
- Now 302
Phoenix InfoNews Channel
- Formerly 37
- Now 323
Shuang Xing
- Formerly 38
- Now 324
Celestial Movies
- Formerly 39
- Now 322
HBO
- Formerly 40
- Now 411
Cinemax
- Formerly 41
- Now 412
STAR Movies
- Formerly 42
- Now 413
Astro BoxOffice Movies
- Formerly 48
- Now 951
Astro BoxOffice Movies
- Formerly 49
- Now 952
Discovery Channel
- Formerly 50
- Now 551
Animal Planet
- Formerly 51
- Now 556
National Geographic Channel
- Formerly 52
- Now 553
Discovery Science
- Formerly 53
- Now 554
The History Channel
- Formerly 54
- Now 555
Nickelodeon
- Formerly 60
- Now 612
Disney Channel
- Formerly 61
- Now 615
Cartoon Network
- Formerly 62
- Now 616
Playhouse Disney Channel
- Formerly 63
- Now 613
STAR World
- Formerly 70
- Now 711
MTV
- Formerly 71
- Now 713
Channel [V]
- Formerly 72
- Now 714
Sun TV
- Formerly 73
- Now 211
Astro Vellithirai
- Formerly 74
- Now 202
Sun Music
- Formerly 75
- Now 212
E!
- Formerly 76
- Now 712
Discovery Home & Health
- Formerly 77
- Now 733
Discovery Real Time
- Formerly 78
- Now 734
Crime & Investigation Network
- Formerly 79
- Now 732
Astro Supersport
- Formerly 80
- Now 811
ESPN
- Formerly 81
- Now 812
STAR Sports
- Formerly 82
- Now 813
Golf Channel
- Formerly 83
- Now 815
Eurosport
- Formerly 84
- Now 814
Astro BoxOffice Sports
- Formerly 88
- Now 954
Astro BoxOffice Events
- Formerly 89
- Now 953
CNN
- Formerly 90
- Now 511
CNBC Asia
- Formerly 91
- Now 518
The News Channel
- Formerly 92
- Now 514
BBC World
- Formerly 93
- Now 512
CCTV9
- Formerly 94
- Now 501
17 Digital Radio Channels
- Formerly 101-117
- Now 852-868
astro@play
- Formerly 200
- Now 882
ITV
- Formerly 800
- Now 881
Astro Stocklink
- Formerly 888
- Now 888
Astro OASIS
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 106
Astro On Demand Movie Barker
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 110
Astro AWANI
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 123
Chutti TV
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 213
Makkal TV
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 203
KBS World
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 303
Astro Xiao Tai Yang
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 325
Astro HUA HEE DAI
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 333
Asian Food Channel
- Formerly *NONE*
- Now 703
Christ... 109 of them... 99 changes... and Astro expect us to "get use to" these flashy new 99 numbers...
Why? Okay let's put it this way. I seldom watch TV, but not that I'm blur about every happenings regarding TVs and channels, in this case, Astro. At first glance I thought this changes is made up by some freaking geniuses at the Astro HQ and "it is suppose to make our life easier".
...
Heck, not only we "press more" now (three digits instead of the usual two), not only our buttons and remote controller wears out faster (...), not only has it increases the "risk"/probability that we'd input wrong channel numbers because of the increased digits, not only our precious AA batteries wear out faster because of the increased digits we have to input and the increased mistakes we'd make that we have to press again and again (bla bla bla), IN FACT I don't mind all these! IF, the changes made would have benefit the users "in some way".
In the olden days when we first got our brand new Astro I could get use to the controlling schemes pretty quickly, in fact I've "mastered" Astro even faster than my dad. I knew thoroughly every features in Astro and I was managed to tweak in-and-out of Astro, from Channel Guide to Info to Menu... (hey it was pretty fascinating for a kid with the age of 9 to do just that yea), sometimes even my dad had to ask me for help.
But guess what I get now? The moment I got my hands on the remote controller I started to feel like I was a total idiot or some outdated "oyaji", for I didn't know what to press on the controller for the very first time of my life =_=. First I wanted to watch Wah Lai Toi, and of course I didn't get what I wanted for the first try. Then I tried Animax, and it was no where to be found (despite the fact that I didn't want to resort to the "ok" button and the Channel Guide database, I wanted a pure input of numbers with the controller)!
Gross... At last I gave up and decided to have a look at the brochure (the photos I enclosed above). And to my farting surprise I found no reason for the authority to have actually reorganized the channel numbers cause although it makes sense, but it confuses me more than it convinces me that they have made the right decision (don't know about you guys, but for me, certainly).
Using my "Extraordinary-Inaccurate-Induction-Ability" a.k.a. "EIIA~!", I have broken down the channel categories into X groups based on their "profound reinvention": -
1
- For unspecified and unknown and I-don't-want-to-know reasons Astro has assigned the value "1" for all Malaysian-based channels, such as RTMs and ntv7 all those. Was it that they accepted bribe from Mr. Patriot or they were trying to "flatter" Malaysian or whether they were showing their patriotism, you wouldn't want to know.
2
- The only changes Astro made onto its channel displacement that I LOVE is this. Astro has WISELY collected all Tamil channels under one number, "2". This is good for me as I would just have to avoid pressing it in any cases for I won't bump into any of these ever again. BUT THEN, why would they choose "2", please la get a worse number la, "2" is too good for this =.= (no offense to Indians).
3
- The evilish number, the number that once conquered Malaysian Chinese for years. This number has been assigned to all of the Chinese channels.
4
- The first number that is assigned not based on languages, the number "4" has been assigned to all movie channels. Why "4"? Beats me.
5
- Things starting to get messy here. At first glance this number is obviously chosen for all of the news channels but why the fart I get Discovery Channel, TVIQ, National Geographic, Discovery Science, The History Channel, and Animal Planet here!!?? Shall I call this a collection of news channels or documentary channels? I'll never know.
6
- All kids channels are here, simple and clean.
7
- Another bizarre mix-match of channels. I have given up on thinking for a "category" for this collection of channels after cycling through "Entertainment" and "Documentary" because I just couldn't find a clear similarity among those channels. What do you get when you cross AXN with Discovery Travel and Living and MTV with Crime & Investigation channel??? "Nasi Campur" channels I'd say.
8
- Sports lovers' lucky number. But beware not to bump into Radio channels, Game channel, and the Astro Stocklink channel as they are all preceded with this number too. Which explains why this is another poorly organized rubbish collection...
9
- The last on the list... And the number that puzzles me most. I couldn't get a farting idea what is this number for as I could only see "ABO" everywhere (which stands for Astro Box Office, with various content categories, including Movies, Events, and Sports). But just the moment before I wanted to assign a group name "ABO" for this number... I saw NHK World (a Japanese channel) on the list... Almost immediately I bit my thumb off, sucked my own toe, scratched my head into a bloody pool of question marks, screamed myself to heaven, and declared this groupd a "ABC" instead of the "ABO", they are Air Batu Campur for Christ's sake!!!
When I had a go-through on what has actually gone wrong approaching to the end of the list (when things are getting "disasterrific" as the number increases), I suddenly realized the answer. Why is this happening? Why are the channels which are not supposingly in the same group/category with others are grouped together? This is simply because we human has only created 10 Roman numbers, from 0 to 9. And it doesn't make sense if any of the channel starts with a "0" so Astro has been chopped down to 9 numbers as their choices. In this case they have only managed to group channels into 9 and any further in-depth grouping would require the users to input 4-digits channel numbers. What does that sound to you? It sure sounds like "fart" to me =_=. And this explains why the channels grouping was getting bizzare approaching the last number on the list, hope you get what I mean.
So after all the crapping, the conclusion? They should have stick to their 2-digits system, that's what I think. At the very least, I don't like it, the "evolutionary system". How about you?
On second thought, if I were to group channel numbers, I'd put like, "8" for the so-called "Entertainment News Channels" (ahem, I call them the Gossipers Channels), "3" for Malaysian channels ("m"), and perhaps "69" for adult channels, if there are any.
Note: The above entry is written wholly based on individual's views/perception/feeling/opinion/crap'sion, and is not meant to flame any particular broadcasting company/race/person as it seems. Any likeliness is simply a mere coincidence and the author would not take any responsibility for what I've said/written/crapped about, please proceed with caution and consider a thousand times before you pick up your phone and call Karpal Singh.
Friday, August 10, 2007
Dragon Tales - When The More is Not Always the Merrier
A story of a little boy who wanted to know the sum of one plus one. First he asked a physicist, who said, If one is matter, and the other is antimatter, then the answer is zero. But if one is a critical mass of uranium and the other is a critical mass of uranium, then that’s an explosive question. Unenlightened, the boy asked a biologist. She said, Are we talking bacteria, mice, or whales? And for how long? In desperation, the boy hired an accountant, who peered closely at him and said, Hmmm. One plus one? Tell me, how much do you want it to be?
WARNING: You wouldn't want to read this if you are in a hurry, it's a useless long list of crap I've written to kill my time. You are warned.
This morning was a weird one, apart from the fact that I'll be taking a test (which has become part of my (everyone's) life every Friday), I saw some funny thing on my way to campus and this inspired me of many things. Okay here's how it goes, when the MC bus took its first stop at PA Block... I saw a shocking scene, no no don't get me wrong nobody was being beaten up or robbed or killed or whatsoever, but then it was already shock enough for me. The truth is... There was only one girl got down from that point =.=""
Okay maybe it doesn't make sense, but please listen to my story first and you will understand eventually.
Okay I'm never been good in story telling so I think here's how it should go... Ahem...
A long long time ago, in a far far away galaxy, "FOR ALL STARS, THERE EXIST" (sorry... over dosage of tests...) a star named the Earth. On the 27th of June, 1988, there born a weirdo baby. Everything seemed to be normal and ordinary but in fact it was not so, in a way. Was this baby special you asked? Yes he is, but he was not the only one. And this is only the beginning of a horrific disaster that strikes every single being on Earth.
The year, 1988. Is was the Year of Dragon. Yes, dragon. The greatness of what a dragon symbolizes has been carved onto every single Chinese's heart throughout the centuries, and it goes on and on... It was believed that those who are given birth in the very year of dragon will bring fortune and prosperity, both to him/herself and its family (or people around it?). Independence, leadership, great strength, you name it; dragon is always being associated with whatever good calamity and quantity that a person has. All in all, in the context of Chinese, "Dragon Rocks!", "wo men dou shi long de chuan ren!".
AND SO, a strange, special, yet not surprising phenomenon will occur in every twelve years in a human lifespan; each time the Year of Dragon comes, Chinese will act as though they have been given great motivation or strength that they'd "race" (in a way) to give birth to as many "long de chuan ren" as they could. "Aiyo Sam Gu... Your baby is soooo cute yo... Aiyoyo son of dragon pulak..." "Haha... Nothing la, you can also get one ma" "Aiyo so good har? Dragon wo..." and so and so and so... "Our neighbor got a newborn dragon!" "Oh we must not be left out! Ah Chai!!!~~~ "Cooperate" with your darling and get me a dragon a.s.a.p! No no not "a", I meant as many as possible! And take that as my order!"
Alright you got the word, "Kiasu" is the term. AND SO, one kiasu leads to another kiasu, and another, and more and more, and more and more and more. Okay I call it the "Power Two Theorem", 2^4^6^n...(2n), n->infinity. Imagine, out of 6.6 billion of total population, there are about 0.9 billion of Chinese, and if according to the birthrate of 20.09 births/1000 population... You can expect a triple that amount in the year of dragon because of all those kiasu-ness, so simple maths tells us that just in the year of dragon itself, world population is gonna increase by a whopping 0.3 billion! And that's not all, the year of dragon is gonna repeat itself for every 12 years, and so Earth is approaching its capacity limit faster and faster!
Though it is believed that people born with the zodiac of dragon lives a bright future, BUT, these are the facts that I discovered
1) The year 1988-One month old.
One word to describe, "Crybaby". But for the dragons even their cries are outstanding and
different from the ordinary kids, instead of the conventional "Waaa Waaa" we have the
"Woo woo" and "Ooo Ooo"
2) The year 1989-One year old.
What more can I say, the first birthday in a dragon's life, cakes, sweets, toys, hugs, kisses, sleep, and sleep, and sleep and sleep, sleep and sleep. Sleep.
3)The year 1990-Two years old.
Erm... Stuck your fingers into a stand-fan and start yelling "waa waa" or "ooo aaa"?
4)The year 1991-Three years old.
"Sorry ma'am, we are out of powder."
"What!? How irresponsible! What would my son feeds on then!?"
"Sorry ma'am, as you know this is the year of dragon."<--overpopulation of babies.
Dragons ARE special aren't we? So it wouldn't surprise if we start to walk and talk now and that we are faster than YOU?
"Mom can I yell at you now?"<--baby language) "Mummy"<--adult language) "Ooh how clever" "Hey I peed!"<--baby language) "Waa..."<--adult language) "Good boy. Good boy doesn't cry"
Man... Us the dragons get our compliment even if we peed!
5)The year 1992-Four years old, Pre-Elementary (home learning).
"Come and follow mummy say... "One, two, three, four, five, six..."
"Don't want! I hate you mummy!"
"Don't say that. Come... Mummy give you a kiss, now listen..."
"Your mouth stinks!"
Oh oh... Dragons ARE special.
6)The year 1993-Five years old, Elementary Year 1.
"Darling, show mummy what have you learn in school today?"
"Shit!"
"What?"
"Shit la you!"
"Huh!?"
Believe me nowadays kids especially the bunch after the dragons learn the word "shit" way faster than the previous generation... And I just witnessed that.<--overpopulation of kids that caused the teachers do not even have the time to bother about what were the kids learning after all, even it means bad words.
7)The year 1994-Six years old, Elementary Year 2.
The dragons finally graduated from the kindergarten. And a dragon is not a dragon without some extraordinary deeds on this special day.
"I'm gonna marry you when I get older!"
Said a dragon to another dragon. And another extraordinary answer from another dragon.
"Who cares about you shit"<--overpopulation of female kids that caused girls looked down on boys as they have much more choices out there.
...
8)The year 1995-Seven years old, Primary Standard 1.
"Sorry ma'am, we are full."
"What!? I want to register my son into your school!"
"No I'm afraid we can't do that, cause we are full"
"..."
"If you are full, why don't you shit at toilet."<--overpopulation of kids caused insufficient space in school and frustration among the parents.
9)The year 1996-Eight years old, Primary Standard 2.
"Aunty, I want a hot dog."
"Sorry we are out."
"How about a fish ball?"
"I'm afraid we can't, it's out as well."
"Then what do you have?"
"We have hot dogs and fish balls as usual, but we are out"
"..."<--overpopulation of kids caused insufficient food supply in the canteen
10)The year 1997-Nine years old, Primary Standard 3.
"Sei lo... PTS wo..."
"Yalo yalo, they said if success you can jump very high wo..."
"Huh? How high wo?"
"Above the standard 4's head lo."
"Wah that sounds cool, as they have been bullying us."
And it turns out to be... FAILED
Dragons' style, even they said they want to do something and they meant it, the possibility of them getting it done is... 3 out of 10.
11)The year 1998-Ten years old, Primary Standard 4.
As a result of overpopulation back then in the year of dragon and as a initiative of cutting cost as the school reduced the amount of classrooms designate for specific forms... Students got cramped together, and denser.
"You stupid shit, if you have passed that PTS earlier you should have begone, stop squeezing in this limited space already!"
"The same goes to you shit!"
Dragon's style, never say "I'm sorry".
Naive.
12)The year 1999-Eleven years old, Primary Standard 5.
"What the heck is UPSR???"
"U Pee n u Sucks Remember?"
13)The year 2000-Twelve years old, Primary Standard 6.
AHA!~ Another Year of Dragon! And you do the maths again, another 0.3 billion into the poll.
"Why did you do so badly in your pre-UPSR test? If so you will never pass and have to sit for Remove!"
"Sorry teacher my brain was infected by Y2K last night..."
What said is said, but still we managed to get pass the Remove. Dragon's style, sometimes we still get what we want, by luck.
14)The year 2001->2005-Thirteen years old to Seventeen years old, Secondary Form 1 to 5.
*Censored*
*"Invalid command name, file not found, please try again later"*
Dragon's style, we tend to hide our darken Secondary Years...
15)The year 2006-Eighteen years old, Foundation/Form Six/Diploma/Certificate.
"Holy dragon! What in the world..."
"What's wrong with these people!? Where in hell did they come from!?"
So much as to say, overpopulation and extreme birthrate back in the year of dragon have once again bring these people under one roof again. This is a place between hell and heaven, where in hell as there are too many, i mean TOO MANY dragons gather under one room and cramp altogether in one place all at the same time, and the dragons had a hard time to search for nice food due to shortage of GOOD QUALITY food because of high demand and low supply, and that the authority has no other choice than to drag the tuition hours and make it longer to accommodate all the students as to provide enough classrooms for them; where in heaven as there are too many students in a classroom that the lecturer won't even notice that there are actually quite a number of dragons "escaped" to their respective wonderlands, and that dragons can make lots more friends here in contrast to other people bearing different zodiac signs. Everytime the dragons have to wait for a bus, get up to the bus, get down from the bus; queue up for food; queue up for toilet; wait for using computers; queue up for results and etc etc, they would have to do it differently than the others. Secret Recipe, KFC, Mc D, Kenny R, SP, MV, KLCC, TS, 1U, virtually anywhere, is cramped with dragons, as this is the favorable season for mating too (which in turn comes a GOOD QUESTION, where in heaven is my first love!? =.=). The road is cramped with dragons too, all with their respective rides, Wira Kancil Saga, Wira and Kancil and Saga, and Wira Kancil Saga. LRTs are cramped, with lots of lots of dragons. Concerts K-Box libraries... And that's not all, cinemas would be cramped too as the dragons are all turning 18, they were too excited about "18sx,18sg,18pl"...
16)The year 2007-Nineteen years old, Degree/Form Six/Diploma/Certificate
Nothing much improved except the fact that the dragons have grown taller and bigger, thus occupying more and more spaces. And that their brain grew smaller and smaller in contradict.
Not so "prosperous" to me at all...
And imagine the huge contrast of when nowadays MC bus stops at PA Block with the previous year; now there are at most 4 to 5 students get down from the bus while other mostly get down to PC and PD (degree students as to say); unlike the year before, when the bus stopped at PA, there used to be lots more student getting down, like about three quarters of the students.
And now we even have to fight for space to eat and use the facilities such as computer labs and library and study rooms, Universiti Tak Ada Ruang is the most suitable name for this "Dragon Lair", as I can't really find many good unoccupied spaces nowadays.
Praise be to Dragon.
Another cold and dry Friday midnight... Drift drift drift...
WARNING: You wouldn't want to read this if you are in a hurry, it's a useless long list of crap I've written to kill my time. You are warned.
This morning was a weird one, apart from the fact that I'll be taking a test (which has become part of my (everyone's) life every Friday), I saw some funny thing on my way to campus and this inspired me of many things. Okay here's how it goes, when the MC bus took its first stop at PA Block... I saw a shocking scene, no no don't get me wrong nobody was being beaten up or robbed or killed or whatsoever, but then it was already shock enough for me. The truth is... There was only one girl got down from that point =.=""
Okay maybe it doesn't make sense, but please listen to my story first and you will understand eventually.
Okay I'm never been good in story telling so I think here's how it should go... Ahem...
A long long time ago, in a far far away galaxy, "FOR ALL STARS, THERE EXIST" (sorry... over dosage of tests...) a star named the Earth. On the 27th of June, 1988, there born a weirdo baby. Everything seemed to be normal and ordinary but in fact it was not so, in a way. Was this baby special you asked? Yes he is, but he was not the only one. And this is only the beginning of a horrific disaster that strikes every single being on Earth.
The year, 1988. Is was the Year of Dragon. Yes, dragon. The greatness of what a dragon symbolizes has been carved onto every single Chinese's heart throughout the centuries, and it goes on and on... It was believed that those who are given birth in the very year of dragon will bring fortune and prosperity, both to him/herself and its family (or people around it?). Independence, leadership, great strength, you name it; dragon is always being associated with whatever good calamity and quantity that a person has. All in all, in the context of Chinese, "Dragon Rocks!", "wo men dou shi long de chuan ren!".
AND SO, a strange, special, yet not surprising phenomenon will occur in every twelve years in a human lifespan; each time the Year of Dragon comes, Chinese will act as though they have been given great motivation or strength that they'd "race" (in a way) to give birth to as many "long de chuan ren" as they could. "Aiyo Sam Gu... Your baby is soooo cute yo... Aiyoyo son of dragon pulak..." "Haha... Nothing la, you can also get one ma" "Aiyo so good har? Dragon wo..." and so and so and so... "Our neighbor got a newborn dragon!" "Oh we must not be left out! Ah Chai!!!~~~ "Cooperate" with your darling and get me a dragon a.s.a.p! No no not "a", I meant as many as possible! And take that as my order!"
Alright you got the word, "Kiasu" is the term. AND SO, one kiasu leads to another kiasu, and another, and more and more, and more and more and more. Okay I call it the "Power Two Theorem", 2^4^6^n...(2n), n->infinity. Imagine, out of 6.6 billion of total population, there are about 0.9 billion of Chinese, and if according to the birthrate of 20.09 births/1000 population... You can expect a triple that amount in the year of dragon because of all those kiasu-ness, so simple maths tells us that just in the year of dragon itself, world population is gonna increase by a whopping 0.3 billion! And that's not all, the year of dragon is gonna repeat itself for every 12 years, and so Earth is approaching its capacity limit faster and faster!
Though it is believed that people born with the zodiac of dragon lives a bright future, BUT, these are the facts that I discovered
1) The year 1988-One month old.
One word to describe, "Crybaby". But for the dragons even their cries are outstanding and
different from the ordinary kids, instead of the conventional "Waaa Waaa" we have the
"Woo woo" and "Ooo Ooo"
2) The year 1989-One year old.
What more can I say, the first birthday in a dragon's life, cakes, sweets, toys, hugs, kisses, sleep, and sleep, and sleep and sleep, sleep and sleep. Sleep.
3)The year 1990-Two years old.
Erm... Stuck your fingers into a stand-fan and start yelling "waa waa" or "ooo aaa"?
4)The year 1991-Three years old.
"Sorry ma'am, we are out of powder."
"What!? How irresponsible! What would my son feeds on then!?"
"Sorry ma'am, as you know this is the year of dragon."<--overpopulation of babies.
Dragons ARE special aren't we? So it wouldn't surprise if we start to walk and talk now and that we are faster than YOU?
"Mom can I yell at you now?"<--baby language) "Mummy"<--adult language) "Ooh how clever" "Hey I peed!"<--baby language) "Waa..."<--adult language) "Good boy. Good boy doesn't cry"
Man... Us the dragons get our compliment even if we peed!
5)The year 1992-Four years old, Pre-Elementary (home learning).
"Come and follow mummy say... "One, two, three, four, five, six..."
"Don't want! I hate you mummy!"
"Don't say that. Come... Mummy give you a kiss, now listen..."
"Your mouth stinks!"
Oh oh... Dragons ARE special.
6)The year 1993-Five years old, Elementary Year 1.
"Darling, show mummy what have you learn in school today?"
"Shit!"
"What?"
"Shit la you!"
"Huh!?"
Believe me nowadays kids especially the bunch after the dragons learn the word "shit" way faster than the previous generation... And I just witnessed that.<--overpopulation of kids that caused the teachers do not even have the time to bother about what were the kids learning after all, even it means bad words.
7)The year 1994-Six years old, Elementary Year 2.
The dragons finally graduated from the kindergarten. And a dragon is not a dragon without some extraordinary deeds on this special day.
"I'm gonna marry you when I get older!"
Said a dragon to another dragon. And another extraordinary answer from another dragon.
"Who cares about you shit"<--overpopulation of female kids that caused girls looked down on boys as they have much more choices out there.
...
8)The year 1995-Seven years old, Primary Standard 1.
"Sorry ma'am, we are full."
"What!? I want to register my son into your school!"
"No I'm afraid we can't do that, cause we are full"
"..."
"If you are full, why don't you shit at toilet."<--overpopulation of kids caused insufficient space in school and frustration among the parents.
9)The year 1996-Eight years old, Primary Standard 2.
"Aunty, I want a hot dog."
"Sorry we are out."
"How about a fish ball?"
"I'm afraid we can't, it's out as well."
"Then what do you have?"
"We have hot dogs and fish balls as usual, but we are out"
"..."<--overpopulation of kids caused insufficient food supply in the canteen
10)The year 1997-Nine years old, Primary Standard 3.
"Sei lo... PTS wo..."
"Yalo yalo, they said if success you can jump very high wo..."
"Huh? How high wo?"
"Above the standard 4's head lo."
"Wah that sounds cool, as they have been bullying us."
And it turns out to be... FAILED
Dragons' style, even they said they want to do something and they meant it, the possibility of them getting it done is... 3 out of 10.
11)The year 1998-Ten years old, Primary Standard 4.
As a result of overpopulation back then in the year of dragon and as a initiative of cutting cost as the school reduced the amount of classrooms designate for specific forms... Students got cramped together, and denser.
"You stupid shit, if you have passed that PTS earlier you should have begone, stop squeezing in this limited space already!"
"The same goes to you shit!"
Dragon's style, never say "I'm sorry".
Naive.
12)The year 1999-Eleven years old, Primary Standard 5.
"What the heck is UPSR???"
"U Pee n u Sucks Remember?"
13)The year 2000-Twelve years old, Primary Standard 6.
AHA!~ Another Year of Dragon! And you do the maths again, another 0.3 billion into the poll.
"Why did you do so badly in your pre-UPSR test? If so you will never pass and have to sit for Remove!"
"Sorry teacher my brain was infected by Y2K last night..."
What said is said, but still we managed to get pass the Remove. Dragon's style, sometimes we still get what we want, by luck.
14)The year 2001->2005-Thirteen years old to Seventeen years old, Secondary Form 1 to 5.
*Censored*
*"Invalid command name, file not found, please try again later"*
Dragon's style, we tend to hide our darken Secondary Years...
15)The year 2006-Eighteen years old, Foundation/Form Six/Diploma/Certificate.
"Holy dragon! What in the world..."
"What's wrong with these people!? Where in hell did they come from!?"
So much as to say, overpopulation and extreme birthrate back in the year of dragon have once again bring these people under one roof again. This is a place between hell and heaven, where in hell as there are too many, i mean TOO MANY dragons gather under one room and cramp altogether in one place all at the same time, and the dragons had a hard time to search for nice food due to shortage of GOOD QUALITY food because of high demand and low supply, and that the authority has no other choice than to drag the tuition hours and make it longer to accommodate all the students as to provide enough classrooms for them; where in heaven as there are too many students in a classroom that the lecturer won't even notice that there are actually quite a number of dragons "escaped" to their respective wonderlands, and that dragons can make lots more friends here in contrast to other people bearing different zodiac signs. Everytime the dragons have to wait for a bus, get up to the bus, get down from the bus; queue up for food; queue up for toilet; wait for using computers; queue up for results and etc etc, they would have to do it differently than the others. Secret Recipe, KFC, Mc D, Kenny R, SP, MV, KLCC, TS, 1U, virtually anywhere, is cramped with dragons, as this is the favorable season for mating too (which in turn comes a GOOD QUESTION, where in heaven is my first love!? =.=). The road is cramped with dragons too, all with their respective rides, Wira Kancil Saga, Wira and Kancil and Saga, and Wira Kancil Saga. LRTs are cramped, with lots of lots of dragons. Concerts K-Box libraries... And that's not all, cinemas would be cramped too as the dragons are all turning 18, they were too excited about "18sx,18sg,18pl"...
16)The year 2007-Nineteen years old, Degree/Form Six/Diploma/Certificate
Nothing much improved except the fact that the dragons have grown taller and bigger, thus occupying more and more spaces. And that their brain grew smaller and smaller in contradict.
Not so "prosperous" to me at all...
And imagine the huge contrast of when nowadays MC bus stops at PA Block with the previous year; now there are at most 4 to 5 students get down from the bus while other mostly get down to PC and PD (degree students as to say); unlike the year before, when the bus stopped at PA, there used to be lots more student getting down, like about three quarters of the students.
And now we even have to fight for space to eat and use the facilities such as computer labs and library and study rooms, Universiti Tak Ada Ruang is the most suitable name for this "Dragon Lair", as I can't really find many good unoccupied spaces nowadays.
Praise be to Dragon.
Another cold and dry Friday midnight... Drift drift drift...
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Aye aye sir, it will be solved in no time!
"If you don't see you've got a problem, then you won't solve it" - Tan Sri Ramon Navaratnam (President of Transparency International Malaysia)
I'm glad to hear your saying Mr. Navaratnam but I would like to modify a little bit on that sentence, "If the public and newsgroup don't say you've got a problem, then you won't have to solve it."
"WTF" you say? Well I was just sounding my opinion behalf the Malaysian culture that we used to practice in this country. Yes this is Malaysian style, this is Malaysia, this is the government of Malaysia, and this is the people of Malaysia. How often do we get news on the corruption of Malaysian authorities, landslide, NS problems, Samivellu issue, Anwa issue, AP issue, the abuse of power, the Datuk issue, the recent Putra Jaya government buildings issue, and many many things else in the past? Not until someone make his/her complains to the specific authority (given that his/her complains are to be taken care of "concerned" officers...), make it to the news, being persistent enough till someone stands out and say something.
Regarding the current issue, the bad quality of newly constructed government buildings, there are three already. Roofs falling off, pipes bursting out... All sorts of troubles. Holy crap! Those buildings are way newer than my hut! Why are these things happening?
For a moment there I was wondering why is it everytime once an unpleasant situation (regarding the government) is being revealed, more and more will come eventually, it's like a chain. Like those landslides, Samivellu's, Datuk issuing, AP issuing, and all... More in-depth information will be revealed and soon enough more and more culprits and troubles will be made to the headlines. Once there is a corruption of building here at Ampang, another case will be reported at Sungai Buloh =.=. Why is it so? I think I have got the answer. This is because things are happening all the time, just that nobody ever dare to report or had any hopes that their complains will be heard. They are not in the news doesn't mean that they are not happening! Many hopes that the news will be overlooked over time, and eventually be forgotten.
The authorities feel that they will have to do something when all of the countrymen begin to doubt their transparency and efficiency because the bad news is all about them. I'm puzzled, I begin to question the transparency of news. Even if I read newspaper almost everyday I still don't think that many unseen truths and happenings are being reported, maybe I'm a little bit of underestimating our government, they can actually manipulate the news! Many problems and bad news about the government that once made a month streak on the headlines will eventually be wiped out from the paper without a good explanation and solution, often leaving the "concerned ones" behind. Soon enough, we'll see...
Star newspaper - N10 "Less talk, do more please."
I'm glad to hear your saying Mr. Navaratnam but I would like to modify a little bit on that sentence, "If the public and newsgroup don't say you've got a problem, then you won't have to solve it."
"WTF" you say? Well I was just sounding my opinion behalf the Malaysian culture that we used to practice in this country. Yes this is Malaysian style, this is Malaysia, this is the government of Malaysia, and this is the people of Malaysia. How often do we get news on the corruption of Malaysian authorities, landslide, NS problems, Samivellu issue, Anwa issue, AP issue, the abuse of power, the Datuk issue, the recent Putra Jaya government buildings issue, and many many things else in the past? Not until someone make his/her complains to the specific authority (given that his/her complains are to be taken care of "concerned" officers...), make it to the news, being persistent enough till someone stands out and say something.
Regarding the current issue, the bad quality of newly constructed government buildings, there are three already. Roofs falling off, pipes bursting out... All sorts of troubles. Holy crap! Those buildings are way newer than my hut! Why are these things happening?
For a moment there I was wondering why is it everytime once an unpleasant situation (regarding the government) is being revealed, more and more will come eventually, it's like a chain. Like those landslides, Samivellu's, Datuk issuing, AP issuing, and all... More in-depth information will be revealed and soon enough more and more culprits and troubles will be made to the headlines. Once there is a corruption of building here at Ampang, another case will be reported at Sungai Buloh =.=. Why is it so? I think I have got the answer. This is because things are happening all the time, just that nobody ever dare to report or had any hopes that their complains will be heard. They are not in the news doesn't mean that they are not happening! Many hopes that the news will be overlooked over time, and eventually be forgotten.
The authorities feel that they will have to do something when all of the countrymen begin to doubt their transparency and efficiency because the bad news is all about them. I'm puzzled, I begin to question the transparency of news. Even if I read newspaper almost everyday I still don't think that many unseen truths and happenings are being reported, maybe I'm a little bit of underestimating our government, they can actually manipulate the news! Many problems and bad news about the government that once made a month streak on the headlines will eventually be wiped out from the paper without a good explanation and solution, often leaving the "concerned ones" behind. Soon enough, we'll see...
Star newspaper - N10 "Less talk, do more please."
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Long live Tuanku!~
Just got back from campus this afternoon and my Core Duo already yelling “Blog it, blog it, blog it, will ya? Blog it! ...” And so here I am again sitting here ‘bogging’ away… What can I say about the test? It was out of expectation that’s all I can say, it was just harder than I can imagine, especially the ‘fill in the blanks’ and ‘insert the appropriate word forms’ parts, everything doesn’t seem normal to me because it’s not UTAR’s standard at all! Well at least it’s not my standard, I think my paper is a goner =.=” Enough of the crapping, let’s get down to real business, I just picked this up along the road side near Jelatek LRT station when I was waiting for the feeder bus to move its buttocks…
=====================================================================================
Pejabat Perdana Menteri Malaysia,
Federal Government Administration Center,
Bangunan Perdana Putra,
62502 Putrajaya.
Universiti Tak Ada Ruang,
No. 13, Jalan 13/6,
46200 Petaling Jaya,
Selangor Darul Ehsan. 26 April, 2007
Prime Minister: Dato’ Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi,
Att: I Love You Tuanku
Well don’t get me wrong, read carefully it’s “I Love You Tuanku” not “I Love You Badawi”, and don’t think I have mismailed this letter, it’s just that I don’t know the address of Yang Dipertuan Agong so I have no choice but resort to this route. Please help me to pass on this letter to baginda as I have important wishes for him.
2. First of all I want to say ribuan terima kasih to baginda because baginda has made this country to what it is today. Today Malaysia is known as one of the world’s topmost exporters of rubber, latex, palm oil, peppers, foot-wear, electronic equipment, textile, wooden furniture, petroleum, tin, and pirated CDs. This really makes me proud as a Malaysian, to contribute myself as an effort to make my country successful I always refuse to use local products, this is because I wanted to reserve those products for Malaysia’s exportation in the global market, if the countrymen are to practice this awareness and be as cooperate as me, Malaysia will undoubtedly not long from becoming the next top exporter of Cicakman, keris, durian, satay, nasi kandar, nasi lemak, cigarettes, toilet bowl, batteries, handbags, tooth paste, toys, toilet rolls, manpower, bloggers, hackers, and the list goes on… Apparently maybe we should try to use more Levis, Nike, Adidas, LV and Tiffany instead of Poh Kong, self-made Manchester football cap, pasar-malam branded shirts… Leave those for the exportation will ya?
3. Second of all I want to criticize those who stated these so-called ‘facts’, they are really mindless and not true at all to me… Have a look and I hope baginda can cepat-cepat issue order to the authority and take action against these uncivilized people, how dare they insult our country like that!?
(1)Out of all the 5 major banks, only one bank is multi-racial, the rest are controlled by malays
(2) 99% of Petronas directors are malays
(3) 3% of Petronas employees are Chinese
(4) 99% of 2000 Petronas gasoline stations are owned by malays
(5) 100% all contractors working under Petronas projects must be bumis status
(6) 0% of non-malay staffs is legally required in malay companies. But there must be 30% malay staffs in Chinese companies.
(7) 5% of all new intake for government police, nurses, army, is non-malays.
(8) 2% is the present Chinese staff in Royal Malaysian Air Force (RMAF), drop from 40% in 1960
(9) 2% is the percentage of non-malay government servants in Putrajaya. But malays make up 98%
(10) 7% is the percentage of Chinese government servants in the whole government (in 2004), drop from 30% in 1960
(11) 95% of government contracts are given to malays
(12) 100% all business licensees are controlled by malay government e.g. Taxi permits, Approved permits, etc
(13) 80% of the Chinese rice millers in Kedah had to be sold to malay controlled Bernas in 1980s. Otherwise, life is make difficult for Chinese rice millers
(14) 100 big companies set up, owned and managed by Chinese Malaysians were taken over by government, and later managed by malays since 1970s e.g. UTC, UMBC, MISC, etc
(15) At least 10 Chinese owned bus companies (throughout Malaysia, throughout 40 years) had to be sold to MARA or other malay transport companies due to rejection by malay authority to Chinese application for bus routes and rejection for their application for new buses
(16) 2 Chinese taxi drivers were barred from driving in Johor Larkin bus station. There are about 30 taxi drivers and 3 are Chinese in October 2004. Spoiling taxi club properties was the reason given
(17) 0 non-malays are allowed to get shop lots in the new Muar bus station (November 2004)
(18) 8000 billions ringgit is the total amount the government channeled to malay pockets through ASB, ASN, MARA, privatisation of government agencies, Tabung Haji etc, through NEP over 34 years period
(19) 48 Chinese primary schools closed down since 1968 - 2000
(20) 144 Indian primary schools closed down since 1968 - 2000
(21) 2637 malay primary schools built since 1968 - 2000
(22) 2.5% is government budget for Chinese primary schools. Indian schools got only 1%, malay schools got 96.5%
(23) While a Chinese parent with RM1000 salary (monthly) cannot get school-text-book-loan, a malay parent with RM2000 salary is eligible
(24) 10 all public universities vice chancellors are malays
(25) 5% - the government universities lecturers of non-malay origins had been reduced from about 70% in 1965 to only 5% in 2004
(26) Only 5% is given to non-malays for government scholarships over 40 years
(27) 0 Chinese or Indians were sent to Japan and Korea under "Look East Policy"
(28) 128 STPM Chinese top students could not get into the course that they aspired i.e. Medicine (in 2004)
(29) 10% place for non-bumi students for MARA science schools beginning from year 2003, but only 7% are filled. Before that it was 100% malays
(30) 50 cases whereby Chinese and Indian Malaysians, are beaten up in the National Service program in 2003
(31) 25% is Malaysian Chinese population in 2004, drop from 45% in 1957
(32) 7% is the present Malaysian Indians population (2004), a drop from 12% in 1957
(33) 2 millions Chinese Malaysians had emigrated to overseas since 40 years ago
(34) 0.5 million Indian Malaysians had emigrated to overseas
(35) 3 millions Indonesians had migrated into Malaysia and became Malaysian citizens with bumis status.
(36) 600000 are the Chinese and Indians Malaysians with red IC and were rejected repeatedly when applying for citizenship for 40 years. Perhaps 60% of them had already passed away due to old age. This shows racism of how easily Indonesians got their citizenships compare with the Chinese and Indians
(37) 5% - 15% discount for a malay to buy a house, regardless whether the malay is rich or poor
(38) 2% is what Chinese new villages get compare with 98% of what malay villages got for rural development budget
(39) 50 road names (at least) had been change from Chinese names to other names
(40) 1 Dewan Gan Boon Leong (in Malacca) was altered to other name (e.g. Dewan Serbaguna or sort) when it was being officially used for a few days. Government try to shun Chinese names. This racism happened in around year 2000 or sort
(41) 0 temples/churches were built for each housing estate. But every housing estate got at least one mosque/surau built
(42) 3000 mosques/surau were built in all housing estates throughout Malaysia since 1970. No temples, no churches are required to be built in housing estates
(43) 1 Catholic church in Shah Alam took 20 years to apply to be constructed. But told by malay authority that it must look like a factory and not look like a church. Still not yet approved in 2004
(44) 1 publishing of Bible in Iban language banned (in 2002)
(45) 0 of the government TV stations (RTM1, RTM2, TV3) are directors of non-malay origins
(46) 30 government produced TV dramas and films always showed that the bad guys had Chinese face, and the good guys had malay face. You can check it out since 1970s. Recent years, this tendency becomes less
(47) 10 times, at least, malays (especially Umno) had threatened to massacre the Chinese Malaysians using May 13 since 1969
(48) 20 constituencies won by DAP would not get funds from the government to develop. Or these Chinese majority constituencies would be the last to be developed
(49) 100 constituencies (parliaments and states) had been racistly re-delineated so Chinese voters were diluted that Chinese candidates, particularly DAP candidates lost in election since 1970s
(50) Only 3 out of 12 human rights items are ratified by Malaysia government since 1960
(51) 0 - elimination of all forms of racial discrimination (UN Human Rights) is not ratified by Malaysia government since 1960s
(52) 20 reported cases whereby malay ambulance attendances treated Chinese patients inhumanely, and malay government hospital staffs purposely delay attending to Chinese patients in 2003. Unreported cases may be 200
(53) 50 cases each year whereby Chinese, especially Chinese youths being beaten up by malay youths in public places. We may check at police reports provided the police took the report, otherwise there will be no record
(54) 20 cases every year whereby Chinese drivers who accidentally knocked down malays were seriously assaulted or killed by malays
(55) 12% is what ASB/ASN got per annum while banks fixed deposit is only about 3.5% per annum.
4. And then I want to thank baginda for making the Anti-Rasuah Campaign a successful one, a corruption-less government with transparency in procedures is a promising boost for a better Malaysia. When we were blocked by a traffic police last few days that uncle so good lar… He said he will give us chance, and when my dad took out a RM 20 note he said “No no, saya *flashes his badge* ANTI-RASUAH!” Isn’t he is the honest type!? He then said “Aku tulis la?” My dad was wondering “Tulis la lu kata tak mau pun…” “Ooh… Tulis lar?” Then my dad flashes the RM20 note again, “Bang haus kah? Biar dik beli minum dekat sana?” “Ooh tak payah lah, bang beli sendiri, pergi la… Ingat lain kail jangan pandu terlalu cepat, dan jangan rasuah polis ya? Terutamanya bila di hadapan Besar punya… *points to an officer with higher rank at the other side which seem to just turned his butt away*” “Oh tau bang, terima kasih ya.” “Sama-sama” Isn’t this just amazing? Our society is once again a step ahead in curbing the ill trend of corruption!
5. Lastly I want to sing our national anthem in honor of baginda installation,
Negaraku,
Tanah tumpahnya darahku,
Rakyat hidup,
Bersatu dan maju,
Rahmat bahagia,
Tuhan kurniakan,
Raja kita,
Selamat bertakhta…
Thank you very much.
Anonymous.
=====================================================================================
Maybe the Prime Minister just got too frustrated and threw away this letter in the middle of nowhere?
(My headache is getting serious… I don’t know what the heck was I writing man…)
Breaking up the rules we made, we are so unsocialized…
-Ellegarden
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